There are moments in healing when something shifts — quietly, tenderly, yet unmistakably.

This week, during the last week of introducing Phase 13 in our  General Meeting we offered a Release Practice. During it we witnessed one of those moments unfold in real time.

In Phasing Out of Trauma, we believe that healing is not just psychological. It is spiritual. It is embodied. And sometimes, it is deeply symbolic — giving our hearts and minds a physical way to express what has lived in us for far too long.

The Chains We Carry

Every women that comes into our meetings carries a myriad of heavy chains, made up of every shape and sized link you can ever imagine.  They carry these chains which have been fastened to them through the traumatic events they've experienced and the unresolved, complex, or compound trauma they still experience. Participating in our meetings, and working through the Phase Work allows them to slowly see the chains for what they are and to identify them, and to recognize what each represents. 

This past Monday, we addressed this in a very symbolic, tangible way. We shared a topic teaching on release, emphasizing what happens in the body when we hold onto the things that are chaining us down - emotional dis-regulation, stress responses, increased hormonal chaos, the havoc in the body that brings with increased tensions, immune suppression, and a constant folding inward into ourselves.

After the teaching, every woman selected a real, metal chain to hold. They held the weight of this chain, and during our Spiritual Practice, received an ivitation from Jesus to transfer something they were ready to let go of into their phsyical chain held in their hands. After they were invited to the foot of His cross, and given an invitation to lay their chains on the cross when they were ready.  

For some, the chain represented shame they’ve carried for decades.
For others, it symbolized fear, betrayal, self-blame, anger, or unanswered questions.
Many carried chains crafted from years of surviving on their own.

But every woman carried her chain — no one else’s.

Because trauma is personal. And the things we hold onto often feel welded to our story.

Coming to the Cross

One by one, women approached at their terms, when they were ready to place their burdens, their chains on the cross.  The cross wasn't glorious, it wasn't huge. It was simple, it was stable.

Some women were ready right away, and eager to give their burden to God, it was a welcome release they'd been waiting for for a long time. Others took time sitting with their burden, feeling the weight and contemplating the emotional release they were about to receive. Some seemed unwilling to let go - or perhaps incapable at that moment. 

Each response was holy, because healing is never forced on us, release cannot be rushed. God, and Jesus our Wounded Healer meets us exactly where were are - whether our hands are still tightly grasping our chains, they're still weighing heavy on our shoulder, or we're placing them into the hands of the one who bears all things with us, and transforms all things for us. 

The Beauty of Emotional Release

As chains began to gather on the cross, something sacred happened:

Faces softened.
Bodies relaxed.
Breathing deepened.
Tears flowed — not from despair, but from relief.

Some women stood with lifted faces, receiving joy as freely as they once carried pain.
Others rested in the quiet, letting God speak into the space the chains once occupied.

This is the mystery of release. When we give God what has held us down, our hearts make room for what can lift us up.

Release Is Not Forgetting

In Phasing Out of Trauma, release does not mean pretending the past didn’t happen. It doesn’t mean minimizing. It doesn’t mean ignoring grief, or  bypassing pain, or rushing to a “happy ending.”

Release means letting God hold what has been crushing us. It means laying down what was never meant to define us. It means trusting that Jesus — our Wounded Healer — can carry what our bodies and hearts were never designed to shoulder alone.

A Sacred Invitation

As the room grew still, one truth became clear:

Every chain has a place at the cross.
Every story is welcome.
Every burden can be surrendered in time.

Whether you are ready to release, or simply ready to imagine the possibility, you are not alone. Healing takes courage — and you have more of it than you think. There is room at the cross for your chain too. And when you’re ready, we’ll walk with you — gently, slowly, one brave step at a time.

For many women, traditional recovery groups have offered a glimpse of hope but not always a home. The 12-Step model has transformed countless lives, especially for those battling addiction, codependency, and substance abuse. But for many women living with the effects of trauma—whether from abuse, loss, neglect, or other wounding experiences—the 12 Steps can feel like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. While they may also be carrying wounds from addiction and codependency or be labeled as co-addicts because their partner is addicted, the meeting never touches the source of their experiences. 

They may sit in a meeting, listen to powerful stories of addiction recovery, and still wonder quietly, “Where do I fit?”

At Phasing Out of Trauma, we believe women healing from trauma deserve a recovery process tailored to their unique needs—one that doesn’t reduce their pain to a pattern of choices or behavior, but honors the impact of what has happened to them.

The 12 Steps were designed for those whose lives had become unmanageable through addiction. Trauma, however, operates differently. It changes how our brains process safety, how our bodies hold stress, and how our spirits experience trust, intimacy, and faith.

Working a program designed for addiction can leave survivors of trauma feeling unseen. Trauma doesn’t always manifest as a craving—it manifests as hypervigilance, emotional shutdown, distrust, or disconnection. What’s needed is not simply abstinence from behavior, but restoration of safety, dignity, and belonging.

Our 18-Phase model was built to integrate psychological insight with spiritual formation—because you can’t fully heal one without the other. The mind, body, and spirit all carry trauma; healing requires that all three be restored together.

Each phase walks a woman through a gradual process of healing, beginning with Sitting With Her Trauma and moving toward Moving Beyond Her Trauma. The phases build upon one another intentionally—each one giving language, perspective, and grace to the next.

This is not about working harder. It’s about being guided gently through a structured, Christ-centered process that allows the heart to catch up to what the mind believes.

We acknowledge God as our Higher Power, and we know Him by name—Jesus Christ, the Wounded Healer. He understands what it means to experience trauma, betrayal, loss, and suffering. He wept with Mary at Lazarus’s tomb, sweat blood in Gethsemane, and carried the weight of humanity’s pain to the cross.

He is not distant from our trauma—He entered it, transformed it, and redeems it still.

That is why Phasing Out of Trauma exists: to offer women a recovery process that holds both faith and psychology in equal measure. Healing is not complete if it restores our minds but not our souls, or our faith but not our sense of safety in our own bodies.

You don’t have to have it all figured out to begin.

• Start by attending a General Meeting, where you can experience community and safety without pressure to share.

• When you’re ready, explore the Phase Work Packets or join a Phase Work Cohort, where you’ll walk through each phase with others who understand.

• For one-on-one support, consider our Mentorship Pathway, where trained mentors walk beside you through the process.

Healing takes time, intention, and grace—but you don’t have to do it alone.

Women healing from trauma don’t need to fit into someone else’s program. They need a process built for them—one that honors their pace, their story, and their faith.

At Phasing Out of Trauma, we believe recovery from trauma isn’t about managing behavior. It’s about reclaiming the wholeness that was always meant to be yours.