Phase Three
Once you've done the hard work of sharing some of your traumatic experiences in group, and all of it to God while you look at who has caused your trauma, or who has failed to address it with you, you're able to free God from the position of inquisitor, and allow Him to take his place as your Savior, while you build more security within the Phasing Out of Trauma Community.
We are happy to have you back with us to work through Phase Three.
I am safe enough to re-visit memories of my past
and go beyond the story to enter the hurt and pain.
I acknowledge God never intended for me to be
harmed. It was not His plan for me or some trial He
decided I needed to undergo.
We admire your strength, and desire to enter into this next Phase of healing work! Know that we are praying for you, and we are here for you as you begin to access the pain and hurt your experiences have caused you, and meet God as your loving and protective Father.
Our Meeting Leaders, Small Group Leaders, and Mentors have been where you are - taking these exact same steps towards greater healing. Like them, you can expect to not have this Phase answer all of your questions, rather it will help to set you build upon the firm foundation you've acquired with God in the last two phases so you can move more freely, and give yourself more access to emotional balance.
Books to Help You Explore Phase Three
The Emotions God Gave You
by Art & Laraine Bennett
In The Emotions God Gave You, Art and Laraine Bennett is one of our Phase Work books for Phase Three.
It help readers understand that emotions are not spiritual failures or obstacles to faith, but God-given signals meant to guide us toward truth, healing, and connection. Drawing from Catholic teaching, psychology, and lived experience, the Bennetts explain how emotions such as anger, fear, sadness, and joy reveal what is happening within us—and how they can lead us toward growth rather than shame when they are understood and honored.
We include this book in Phase 3 because it helps women begin to interpret their emotional responses within the context of their story, rather than judging or suppressing them. As participants examine painful experiences and the beliefs formed around them, this resource offers language for discerning what emotions are communicating and how God works through them. It supports the Phase 3 work of untangling spiritual confusion, reframing distorted messages about God, and learning to listen to emotions as part of a redemptive narrative—one where God meets us not despite our emotions, but through them.
When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold S. Kushner
When Bad Things Happen to Good People is our second Phase Work book for Phase Three
In When Bad Things Happen to Good People, Rabbi Harold S. Kushner gently confronts one of the most painful spiritual questions trauma survivors carry: Why did this happen to me? Writing out of his own experience with profound loss, Kushner challenges the belief that suffering is a punishment from God or a sign of personal failure. Instead, he offers a compassionate framework that separates human pain from God’s character, helping readers release the burden of self-blame and distorted theology.
This book is especially meaningful for Phase 3, where women begin to examine how painful experiences shaped not only their lives, but their understanding of God. Kushner’s reflections support the work of untangling harmful spiritual messages—such as “God caused this” or “I deserved this”—and replacing them with a more honest, humane view of suffering. While not offering simple answers, the book creates space for grief, truth, and healing, reminding readers that God’s presence is found not in the cause of suffering, but in the compassion that accompanies us through it.
A Sacred Sorrow by Michael Card
A Sacred Sorrow is the Bible Study Book we've chosen for Phase 3.
In A Sacred Sorrow, Michael Card invites readers to rediscover the biblical practice of lament—a language of faith that allows sorrow, confusion, and unanswered questions to be brought honestly before God. Drawing deeply from Scripture, especially the Psalms, Card shows that lament is not a lack of faith, but a profound act of trust. It is the place where pain is named, grief is honored, and relationship with God remains intact even when understanding is absent.
We have chosen Sacred Sorrow as the Bible study for Phase 3 because it gives women permission to tell the truth about their suffering without spiritualizing it away or assigning blame. As participants begin to examine the emotional and spiritual impact of their experiences, this study helps them release harmful beliefs that God caused their pain or expects silence in suffering. Instead, it teaches that God welcomes honest grief and meets us in sorrow with compassion. In Phase 3, lament becomes a sacred bridge—allowing women to understand their story more fully while remaining rooted in a God who listens, stays, and heals.
Breaking the Silence: The Journey from Rape to Redemption by Lenita Reeves
Breaking the Silence is our Inspirational Story for Phase Three.
In Breaking the Silence, Lenita Reeves courageously shares her journey of surviving sexual assault and the long road toward healing and redemption. With honesty and faith, she gives voice to the pain, confusion, and spiritual questions that often follow trauma—especially the silence imposed by shame and fear. Her story bears witness to the reality that trauma impacts not only the body and mind, but also one’s understanding of God, trust, and self-worth.
We include this story in Phase 3 because it reflects the sacred work of naming truth and confronting the spiritual and emotional distortions that trauma can create. Lenita’s testimony reminds women that speaking the truth of what happened is not a betrayal of faith, but a path toward redemption and restoration. As participants seek to understand their own stories, this book offers hope that even the deepest wounds can be brought into the light and met by a God who listens, stays, and heals.
Why Emotions Matter by Tristen Collins L.P.C. and Jonathan Collins
In Why Emotions Matter, Tristen Collins and Jonathan Collins offer a clear, accessible framework for understanding emotions as meaningful indicators rather than problems to be avoided. Drawing from clinical counseling practice and Christian faith, they explain how emotions develop, what they communicate, and why ignoring or suppressing them can deepen confusion and distress—especially for those with a history of trauma.
We include this book in Phase 3 as an informational companion to help women make sense of the emotional responses that arise as they examine their stories. As participants encounter grief, anger, fear, or sadness connected to past experiences, this resource provides language and structure for understanding those emotions without judgment. It supports the Phase 3 work of discernment—learning to listen to emotions as signals of unmet needs or unresolved wounds—while reinforcing the truth that emotions are part of how God designed us to process, heal, and grow.
Phase 3 Prayer Practices
Exploring Emotions
- Sit quietly in the sacred place you created. Breathe in deeply, exhale slowly, and feel your body relax.
- Ask God for wisdom about your emotions related to your trauma story.
- Spend time gazing at Plutchik’s Wheel of Emotions.
- Which emotions do you still feel around your trauma story today? Write them down.
- See where these emotions lie in your body. Trauma is often trapped in our bodies. You can run through a brief body scan. Journal your insights.
- Journal thoughts/feelings around each emotion. Write what happened that caused this emotion in you.o For example, if you still feel anger or rage, write about the event or a person(s) who made you feel angry. Hold nothing back.
- Thank God for these human emotions and for allowing you to accept them. Invite God to be with you now, acknowledging and holding these painful feelings. Sink into your chair as if you are sinking into God’s love.
- For those who love art, try expressing these emotions in a drawing, painting, sculpture, etc.As you gaze at your creativity, what is God saying to you?
- For those of you who want to Aromatherapy, choose the hydrosols and essential oils during this practice to help you access the specific emotion you’ve encountered. Inhale the aroma in3-5 breaths throughout the practice.
- If after exploring this emotion, you find yourself preoccupied with it and unable to stop ruminating on it, go through an EFT tapping round on that emotion, naming the intensity and continuing until the intensity decreases to a 0-2.
Ask for wisdom if there is any more work, healing, or therapy needed around these emotions of your trauma story. For example, anger can come up when we think of our story. If it turns to rage or disturbs your well-being, it could be a sign that you need more healing work.After working with a specific emotion and finding balance, you may notice in a few days, a week, a month, or longer to “peel another layer” if the emotion is stirred back up. A teacher once said, “Our healing journey can be compared to peeling an artichoke. As a layer of pain/trauma is peeled away, slowly one gets to the heart.”
Body Scan
While in your safe place, find a comfortable position to be. You can lie down, sit, or recline as long as you are comfortable.
When you find comfort, close your eyes and invite God into your space. Call to mind how He created you, knitting you together in your mother’s womb, lovingly crafting every attribute that makes you “you.”
Ask God to give you wisdom, insight, and a keen observation during this time, and just pay attention to what you sense, making note of these findings in your mind.
Starting at the bottoms of your feet – notice what you are feeling and sensing. How are they interacting with the floor, chair, couch or bed. Where is there tension? Where is there contact? Where is there lightness? Can you feel your breath reaching your feet? How are your toes? Are they touching each other closely or curled under, gripping the floor? Are they splayed out relaxed and open or stretching and calling the breath down further into your feet? How do the tops of your feet feel? Are they cold? Are they extended and pointing to a wall, or the floor, or are they flexed and pulling the foot closer to the body?
Move up your body part by part and ask yourself similar questions at each part moving through your legs, including your ankles, calves, knees, thighs, and hips.
Pelvis (including your uterus, vagina, vulva, Fallopian tubes, bladder, colon and rectum and sacral spine).
Abdomen (including your large intestines, small intestines, gallbladder, liver, spleen, appendix, kidneys, stomach and lumbar spine).
Diaphragm (how it attaches to the rib-cage, how it separates the chest from the abdomen, how far it extends into the abdomen during the breath cycle, how small and tight it gets during the breath cycle).
Chest (including your rib cage, sternum, breasts, lungs, heart, esophagus, trachea, thoracic spine, shoulder blades, armpit, and sides).
Arms (including your collar bone, shoulder, upper arm, elbow, lower arm, wrists, palm and tops of the hands, and fingers top bottoms and sides).
Neck (including your cervical spine, trachea, esophagus, the muscles that run down the side of the neck, your voice box, throat, the bottom of your tongue, thyroid, and parathyroid).
Face (chin, jaw, gums, teeth, tongue, top of the mouth, back of the throat, lips, nose, nasal cavities, checks, eyes, eyelids, eyebrows, forehead, temples, ears, inner ear canal, hairline).
Skull (including the top of the spine, the back of the head, the top of the head, the front of the head, your hair, your brain).
God Moments
You have searched me, , and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you, , know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there, if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
Psalm 139: 1-9
Writing Out Your God Moments
Choose one of these questions to reflect on each time you visit this practice.
- When have you felt God’s presence in your life?
- When have you seen His presence in the life of another?
- When have you seen His presence in the Bible?
- Where have you seen His presence in the life of a Saint?
- How does it make you feel that God knows your thoughts, ways, and is with you wherever you go?
- How does this make you feel about yourself?
At the end of your responses today write – God is the same then as He is now and will be the same tomorrow.
Return to this practice during the week of our “Open” Meetings to update your answers as you continue to grow, expand and explore. Notice as you continue with your helaing if you’re able to experience more God moments than before.
Writing Out Your Laments
A lament is defined as a passionate expression of grief or sorrow. We see the laments of King David in the Psalms. He poured out his heart to God with gut wrenching, authentic writings and prayers. Scripture tells us he was a man after God’s heart. We too have permission to lament to God. Read this brief Lament from Psalm 13.
1 How long, ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
3 Look on me and answer, my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
4 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
6 I will sing the ’s praise,
for he has been good to me.
Writing Out Your Lament.
Now it is your turn. Write what it is you’ve been feeling and experiencing; and let it all out. Hold nothing back. Say what is really going on in your heart and mind. God is big and can take it. What matters to you, matters to Him. (If you have not yet read Sacred Sorrow, you may want to read through it before starting this practice).
Here are a few prompts to help you get started:
- What has happened to you?
- Where do you find yourself?
- What have you endured?
- What is your Vav Adversative moment? (Notice in Verse 5 the “but”)
- What are your takeaways about who God is? and what He’s doing in your life?
- What has God done for you or others in the past
- What is God promising to do for you specifically?
Spend some time during this phase praying through the following scriptures with Lectio Divina.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”Jeremiah 29:11
What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us?Romans 8:31
For the eyes of the range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. 2 Chronicles 16:9
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:8-10
Lectio Divina - God Never Intended Me to Be Harmed
Sadly, some of us have heard that our trauma was God’s plan or intention for us. Or some test we had to undergo. This is far from the truth. As stated in Phase Two:
God does not cause trauma. People do.
Hopefully, you have spent some time engaging in the previous practices with God and are experiencing his love, goodness, and mercy for you. Recall that God is good. God is love. There is no darkness in God. He is not punishing you. His intention is to love you deeply, draw you closer into a relationship, and offer you compassion and healing transformation. This is the God we know. As you continue to spend time with God, you too, will know this in your heart.
A healthy parent wants what is best for their child. A normal parent does not harm the child. As the child grows and steps out into life, sometimes they can get wounded. The parent grieves. Offers comfort and help if the child chooses. It was never the father’s intention for the child to suffer pain. Even though trauma happens, nothing can separate the child from his mother’s love. Same is true with God as our parent.
Some of you did not have healthy parents and may even have had harmful parents. Our hearts go out to you. Our prayer is that you will see God as the perfectly healthy, loving parent as you move through these phases.
Lectio Divina is simply reading scripture out loud, allowing God to speak to our soul. Some people, especially those who are auditory processors, benefit from listening to the scripture. Dr. Christine Paintner (2011) describes in her book; Lectio Divina the Sacred Art four movements in this prayer
practice.
The passage is read slowly three times.
1. Listen for a word or phrase that jumps out at you. She compares this to chewing a piece of food.
2. Reflect on any images, feelings, or memories that stir inside you. She relates this to savoring the piece of food.
3. Listen for an invitation from God. Is He asking something of me? This can be compared to digesting the food.
4. Slow down and be still in God’s presence. This is more about being with God, not doing for God. I think of this as the satisfying feeling and resting after a big Thanksgiving dinner.
Spend some time during this phase praying through the following scriptures with Lectio Divina.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us?Romans 8:31
For the eyes of the range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. 2 Chronicles 16:9
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:8-10
Reflection on God’s Character
We all tend to attribute God attributes that reflect His creation or that we’ve found to be true of our parents or others in authority over us at various times in our lives. Part of this journey of phasing out of our trauma will be renewing our image of God.
During this phase, take some time reflecting on these characteristics of God. You may want to find some scriptures of your own as well. Journal your answers and insights.
God is the Creator. What He made was good, pure, and beautiful. Gen. 1:31.
What part of creation brings you comfort or joy?
How does it make you feel you were created good, just like Adam?
God sees you as pure. How does this speak to you?
You have always been and will always be beautiful in the eyes of God. What are your thoughts and feelings about this truth?
God is infinite and beyond my understanding and yet I can have a relationship with Him. Isaiah 55:8-9.
How does knowing God wants to strengthen your friendship make you feel?
What has your relationship with God been like?
What, besides your trauma, has gotten in the way of that friendship?
God created me in His image. Genesis 1:27.
What does this tell you about yourself and how important you are to God?
What features of God are you most excited about having? What features of God are you least excited about having?
God is Audient: one who hears. And He genuinely listens to me. Ex. 2:23-25, 3:7.
How good does it feel to be fully heard and understood by someone?
What does it mean to you that the God of the Universe wants to take the time to listen to you, and hear what you have experienced?
What do you need to tell Him?
God is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in love. Ps. 145:8.
When have you experienced someone providing you grace?
When have you seen someone extend compassion towards you?
Who or what has given you an abundance of love?
Imagine God as the best parts of all these people wrapped up into one supreme being and multiply their grace, compassion, patience, and love by infinity! What parts of your life or your spirit shout for joy at this knowledge?
God’s spirit is in me, guiding, comforting, helping me. I am not alone. John 12:27, 12-15.
How does it make you feel that you are not alone and have guidance, help, and comfort in this journey?
How hard is it to feel you can rely on God to provide you these things?
When has he provided them to you in the past?
God deeply loves me. Nothing can separate me from His love. Not a thing! Romans 8:38-39.
As you reflect on this passage, how does it make you feel?
Have there been times that you felt separated from God’s love?
Take the time today to express that loss, sorrow, and rejection to Him. Let Him to speak to you and start the healing dialogue. Be patient, this may take time to fully heal and to fully hear God’s explanation, and to see where He was in these times.
God knows you. He knows you so well, even the number of hairs on your head. Luke 12:7.
This can be a scary concept. Most of us try to hide certain parts of ourselves from the people who love us in order to retain their love. God loves you in spite of everything you’ve done. He loves you and knows you inside and out. What have you held back from telling Him what He already knows and wants to hear straight from you?
Does it provide relief or worry knowing that whatever you say will not be “news” to Him, but will only verify and validate His knowledge and love of you?
God works through my trauma. All things work together for good, even the hard times in life. Romans 8:28.
Although God did not cause the trauma, He does work through our wounds to bring about good. Do you believe this to be true for you?
How have you seen Him do this in the life/lives of others?
If God were to work your trauma together for your greatest possible good, what could that outcome look like?
God has my back. He is for me, not against me. Romans 8:31.
It might be hard to grasp this truth about our Lord in the midst of trauma. Recall a time when God did have your back. What did He do for you?
In light of this, what can you ask Him to do for you now, so you can rest assured He is with you and your healing efforts?
God is good. Psalm 25:8
Since God is good, and He never intended you to experience this harm, what were His intentions for your life?
What was His plan and purpose for your life?
Can you trust that while trauma took away part of the plan - His purpose is still in effect, and He will continue to work with you to achieve it?
How does that make you feel that your hopes, dreams, goals, and aspirations are going to be resurrected through this process?
Phase 3 Healing Activities
EFT Tapping Through Your Trauma Timeline
When we are asked to enter the emotional valleys we’ve avoided for so long, it can be surprising how much feeling there is. The unhealthy tendency is to stuff uncomfortable or painful emotions. The somatic practice of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is a tool to help process emotions and allow us to release them.
There are several steps to EFT -
- The first is to name what emotion, memory, or physical sensation is coming up for you.
- Then you want to rate it on a scale of 0-10, with 0 being absolutely no problem for you, and 10 being something so big you simply can't focus on anything else because it's overwhelming.
- Then you come up with an "Even though statement" Where you name how you're feeling, and acknowledge that even though you feel that way you love and accept yourself. For instance - "Even though I feel this deep despair, I still love and accept myself."
- Then you're ready to go through the tapping points. Point 1 is your Even though statement, Points 2-8 are the points you'll tap on as you move through the EFT practice.
- As you move through the EFT tapping points, you'll tap on each area while you say or think a brief statement, or simply allow yourself to feel the emotion and recognize what it's bringing up for you. Ideally you want to be able to tap at least 5-7 times on each point before moving to the next, and you'll stay at point 1 until you repeat your "Even though statement" 3 times.
- When you come to the natural conclusion of the rounds (repeating as needed while there is still strong feelings, statements, or thoughts) you take a few deep breaths
- Check back in with yourself to see how high on the scale the though/feeling/sensation is now.
- If the scale rating is higher than a 1-2 continue the process - this time your "Even though statement" will shift to "Even though I'm still feeling a little.... I still (or absolutely, or will continue to) love and accept myself. For instance, "Even though I'm still feeling a little despair and sadness, I will continue to love and accept myself."
- Sometimes one emotion will go down, and another will rise, or it will bring up additional memories or sensations. It's okay to continue going through the points being patient as you work through what your body, and mind are asking you to process. It's also okay to acknowledge if you don't have time to go into that right now. Simply saying something like, "I know this is something I need to work on more. I don't have the time to do that right now, I will practice self compassion, and continue to love and accept myself, and my time limitations until I can work on this some more. I have plenty of time to resolve this, and I can move forward in healthy and positive ways with the rest of my day."
Aromatherapy for Plutchik’s Emotions Wheel
As you work through Plutchik's emotion wheel, you may notice that some emotions keep coming up. Aromatherapy can help you balance these emotions, access them safely, and process them with fewer judgments to reach the “other side” and find empowerment once again.
You will notice that the “other side” of the emotions that we’re encouraging you to experience is the softer, subtler aspect of the opposite emotion. This softer, subtler aspect of the emotion is the aspect of the emotion where we can remain level-headed and continue to think logically and rationally in order to move forward.
Activity
Based on the negative emotion you’re re-experiencing, select the essential oil.
Example: I am disgusted I’ve let my trauma affect me so much. **Cardamom or **Wintergreen.
- Uncap the essential oil and hold the bottle 6-9 inches away from your nose.
- Inhale the aroma through your nose slowly like you are smelling a flower.
- Exhale the breath through your mouth like you’re blowing a dandelion or a candle.
- Repeat 2-4 more times.
- Work through the emotion allowing the memories to play out in your mind. Feel the sensations within your body. Instinctively repeat the inhaled breath work whenever you need to. Journal your insights.
- Then select an essential oil from the opposite emotion
Example: I want to fill acceptance for myself. **Rose or **Pink Pepper
- Take 3-5 slow breaths of this aroma.
- Allow the suggestions this aroma brings up in you to manifest.
- Pay attention to what thoughts come into your head, what sensations your body feels now.
- Journal your takeaway.
Uncomfortable Emotion | *Essential Oils to Inhale | → | Other Side of the Emotion | *Essential Oils to Inhale |
Rage | Cardamom or Turmeric | → | Apprehensive | **Cassia or **Cinnamon |
Anger | Cardamom or Spikenard | → | Apprehensive | **Cassia or **Cinnamon |
Annoyance | **Citronella | → | Apprehensive | **Cassia or **Cinnamon |
Loathing | **Thyme or Cardamom | → | Acceptance | **Rose or **Pink Pepper |
Disgust | **Thyme or **Wintergreen | → | Acceptance | **Rose or **Pink Pepper |
Boredom | Dill | → | Acceptance | **Rose or **Pink Pepper |
Grief | Lime or **Geranium | → | Serenity | Wild Orange or **Peppermint |
Sadness | Ylang Ylang or Siberian Fir | → | Serenity | Wild Orange or **Peppermint |
Pensive | Marjoram or Cedarwood | → | Serenity | Wild Orange or **Peppermint |
Amazement | **Basil or Neroli | → | Interest | Geranium or Marjoram |
Surprise | Juniper Berry or Cypress | → | Interest | Geranium or Marjoram |
Distraction | Litsea or Lemon | → | Interest | Geranium or Marjoram |
Terror | Juniper Berry or **Yarrow | → | Annoyance | **Citronella |
Fear | Lavender or **Peppermint | → | Annoyance | **Citronella |
Apprehension | **Cassia or **Cinnamon | → | Annoyance | **Citronella |
*Ensure that you are using therapeutic grade essential oils so that you are experiencing the full natural fragrance of the plant represented in the oil and not a “fragrance” quality essential oil that has been adulterated with added organic chemical components as these “fragrance” essential oils can cause headaches, and increase adverse reactions and can aggravate you rather than balance you emotionally. *
Ancient Art of Storytelling Part Two
In the last phase, you started telling your mentor parts of your story from the trauma timeline in a very detailed manner. As they retold your story, you took the time to journal insights and reflections that came up during the process.
In this phase, you’ll be re-telling your story by adding lamentation. Describe the sadness, hurt, and pain in all aspects of your story. This can include recalling weather, time of day, colors, attitudes, words, expressions, thoughts, and actions associated with sadness.
If parts of your story are still triggering, we encourage you to work with your therapist to find more balance and stability before sharing your story with your mentor. Even when you’re ready to share your story with your mentor, you can decide what feels safe. You can skirt anything that feels too overwhelming or is not yet safe.
How to tell your story.
Pick one story to focus on each time you meet with your mentor. Start with what is safe for you to access. If anything brings up feelings or behaviors that are too strong or trigger memories, process them with your therapist before moving forward.
Imagine that you’re telling the story as a narrator queuing up and telling about a scene on a movie screen. Bring as many details into the story as you are able. Set the scene; how old are you, what time of year is it, what time of day is it, what is the weather like? Involve your senses - what can you see around you, what can you hear, what can you feel, what can you smell and what can you taste?
Again, in this second telling, try to include as many elements as possible that lean to sadness, grief, sorrow.
Allow your mentor time to write down the essential details.
When you have completed the storytelling, allow your mentor to tell your story and recount the details they picked up on. Let him or her ask you questions, knowing you do not need to answer them if you’re not ready.
The two of you may also talk about what’s changed from this version of the story versus the version you told during the last phase. It is important after telling your story to journal the insights you’ve discovered. Remember, you will return to this process during the next five phases as you continue to build on the stories you told in Phase Two.
Where was God?
During this phase, we’re tapping into emotions, which are one way to express ourselves. Another way we can express ourselves is through art. We encourage you to explore the question: Where was God during my trauma?
Using whatever art materials you feel comfortable with, take the time to draw/paint/collage/doodle where God was during the traumatic event that prompted you to come to Phasing Out of Trauma.You are welcome to copy this page, or simply use blank paper if you want to explore this question.
Title your image, and on the back of the paper, write down an explanation of what you’ve depicted.
When You're Ready to Move On
Have you completed the work of this Phase: tapping into the pain and hurt you feel because of what you've experienced, going beyond the mask of the facts and into the heart of the story? Have you encountered a loving, caring God who cherishes you, and cried over you, for you and with you? Whose heart is angered at what you've experienced and endured because of it, and who desires to see you made whole again?
Then we ask that you share your journey with us. With the exception of a few questions all of the information you share with us will only be used for internal purposes to help us ensure that the next woman who starts this Phase has the best possible experience within it as possible.
And most importantly we look forward to celebrating this milestone with you!
I've Completed A Phase!
It's Time to Celebrate!
As survivors of trauma, one of the things that our trauma has taken from us is our ability to celebrate our victories!
Before you continue into Phase 3, we want to honor and celebrate your dedication to find the healing God desires you to have, and your openness to allow Him into your healing process.
We will do this in group by acknowledging your progress together! At your celebration you'll receive your 3rd charm to place on your Phasing Out of Trauma charm bracelet, as well as prayers, encouragement, and support from the members of your group or within your meeting.
This celebration will take place at our next Open Discussion Meeting that you are able to attend. If you've been working with a mentor, we'd love to have them join us as well. We will discuss this with you after you submit the form above.
